Joe's Movie Corner

JMC Is Dead. Long Live...

2008-06-02T12:20:00.002-04:00

The picture will send you there.

Endgame

2008-05-31T19:53:00.002-04:00

I REALLY hate to do this during the Chloes, but it's all I've been thinking about lately, how necessary I've found it to get this over with:

Joe's Movie Corner is beyond the point of no return.

It's grown too pointless to keep up. Too staled. I've doomed it myself, and from the moment I created it's name. I used my actual name instead of my pen/preferred name in the title and, by assumption, restricted myself to only film, which I've never focused on completely, which makes me depressed. And this is in no way, shape or form a corner. People grow up. They realize their mistakes. But sometimes, like the Holocaust to Germany or Dakota Fanning to her parents, they can't be undone by mere apologies or witch-trials.

So I'm afraid this is the end of the road for JMC. Or at least very near the end.

But do not cry for me... like you'd be crying for me ...this is not my end. I've actually already created a new blog... a less restricted and more free blog. Where I can talk about whatever the frak I want without feeling I owed something to my readers. Oh, don't worry - it will still be film-centric, it just won't be a foolish attempt at being limited to just film. Plus: it's neon-y! And who doesn't love neon?

So... um... yeah. If you have any questions or loose ends to tie up, please, don't hesitate to ask. Or if there is anything I'm forgetting, PLEASE don't hesitate to ask!

Now, we just wait for the body to die, and it'll be all over...

Monday Chloe Update

2008-05-26T16:36:00.002-04:00

BODY OF WORK
HERO OF THE YEAR
BEST OPENING SEQUENCE

I'm getting into a really nice groove with these, especially with writing the thought boxes. It'll be hard for me to top the ones for Supporting Actress and Character Intro, but hey, at least I'm actually doing them!

Well, what do you think? Pleeease tell me.

Sunday Chloe Update

2008-05-25T07:14:00.001-04:00

BEST PRODUCTION DESIGN
BEST ORIGINAL SONG
BEST ACTOR OR ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING VOICE-OVER ROLE
BEST MIX-TAPE SCORE

I am on a roll, people. Don't be surprised if you end up being surprised at some of these nominees. You know what I mean.

Well, what do you think? Pleeease tell me.

Best Actress in a Supporting Role

2008-05-24T06:51:00.004-04:00

BEST ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE

Yup, I'm back to doing it! Yay!

It was a weirdly great year for the category, but one that still gets outshined by Actress. Because, despite the lead category's mighty complex of shortlisters, Supporting's is even larger, only less interestingly, ya know?

Well, what do you think? Pleeease tell me.

General Update

2008-05-22T15:28:00.003-04:00

#1 - Sorry I haven't been doing much on the Chloes. I want to do the big categories to get them out of the way, but I don't want to them before everything else, but I haven't been ecstatic to them. But I will. Eventually.

#2 - My life is sinking lower and lower into the pits of hell. But it might actually be reaching low enough for change to happen, so that's a - hesitant - YAY.

#3 - I wish I had an iPod. A Sansa just doesn't cut it. *sigh*

#4 - I was up for like, 24 hours yesterday, and I was only tired through the last hour of it. And then I only got less than 9 hours of sleep, and now my eyes are screaming at me. NOT. FUN.

#5 - I feel like shit.

What about you? What's up?

Today's Random Thought

2008-05-21T17:18:00.001-04:00

Regina Spektor is a better person than you just by existing.

GET EXCITED, PEOPLE

2008-05-20T07:16:00.003-04:00

Seriously, PAY ATTENTION TO ME!!!!! AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

...ahem...
Okay, I've got 9 categories up as of right now, one on each page. And why not, I might as well list them (the posted ones in bold):

Majors - Picture, Director, O Screenplay, A Screenplay, Animated, Documentary, Foreign
Acting - L Actor, L Actress, S Actor, S Actress, L/C Actor, L/C Actress
Arts/Techs 1 - Cinematography, Costume Design, Film Editing, Production Design
Arts/Techs 2 - Make-Up, O Score, O Song, Visual Effects
Secondary Acting - Y Actor, Y Actress, V/O Actor, V/O Actress, V/O Supporting, Ensemble
People Awards - Body of Work, Acting Breakthrough, W/D Breakthrough, Mix-Tape Score*
Character Awards - Hero, Villain, Character Intro, Quote
Scenes - Scene, Action, Musical/Music, Musical/Non-Music, Opening, Ending
Marketing - Poster, Tagline, Title

I've had to update 2 of the categories between their posting and now because of a quick re-evaluation or mind-blank (von Sydow, d'oh!), but that's okay, right? Just minor tweaks. Also, if there's anything or anyone or whatever missing a nomination or a mention that you find odd, don't be afraid to speak up. I have the memory of a squirrel on smack, and I need YOUR HELP! Whee!

But seriously, just speak up. Anything I'm doing right, wrong, left -- I thrive on comments, because it's proof that you're actually out there. Please?
* - It didn't fit anywhere else.

Okay, So I've Already Started Them...

2008-05-18T19:32:00.005-04:00

LOL, yeah. I just couldn't resist. Some categories I can't do yet -- still need to get pictures, re-watches -- but why else the hell not? Yeah. Here's the link. So, everyone, what are your thoughts so far?

Random Chloe Update

2008-05-18T03:38:00.001-04:00

The nominations are coming in a couple days, but a few things:

1. The two contenders for my #5 Best Actor are in a mortal death match.

2. Best Supporting Actor will never not be weak.

3. Casey Affleck is LEAD, dammit! Shut up, brain!

4. Atonement is surprisingly vacant... WTF OMG ok nvrmnd.

5. I'm still allowing films I've seen the past couple days into it, and they might be making a strong appearance.

6. Laura Linney is God.

7. Natalie Portman is awesome in Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium.

8. Marion Cotillard as Edith Piaf is still surprisingly hot.

9. QUIRK GETS YOU NOWHERE, PEOPLE.

10. "All I wanna do is find a way back into love, I can't make it through without a way back into love..."

11. Daniel Brühl is turning me gay.

Stay tuned folks!

2008-05-14T16:17:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday, Mrs. Upton.

Chlo Air

2008-05-14T03:01:00.003-04:00

Yup, it's that time of year again, folks! Or, rather, the first time, 'cuz that actual first time was so annoying flawed, I've just decided to block it out completely! Whee!

We hit the 15-month deadline Sunday, and even though I still have some things to see, I have decided that whatever I see from now on won't be eligible for the official awards. I've had enough time, and I somehow managed to see 102 of 'em.

Now, I have a good figuring of most of the nominees and most of the winners, but there are some things that are completely up in the air. I need to re-watch a lot of things, in addition to the mini-flood of unseen '07 movies I've idiotically subjected myself to recently in the hopes that I could delude the deadline just a tad longer. Oops.

So, I've decided to give myself about a week, maybe less, before I start rolling out the nominations. No official date though, 'cuz every time I do that, it just ends up being even more pushed back. Of course I'm very sad to bar out some movies I know would be huge if I saw in time, like Control and Persepolis. Every time I see the trailer for the latter, I actually start crying, because a) it's so damn beautiful! and b) I still haven't seen it. Boo, you whore.

Finally, concerning the nominees and winners themselves: don't expect anything. I might just surprise you, even if some things are fairly obvious. Well, probably a lot of things'll be obvious, if you keep up with JMC. Okay, fine -- even if you've never been here before, you know who's gonna win at least Supporting Actress. But please, keep in mind that anything can happen, especially the stupid little things that could add up to a stupid big thing. We'll see.

But With Nothing To Consider, They Forget My Name

2008-05-12T16:58:00.004-04:00

I've found myself increasingly obsessed with The Ting Tings. They're a pop-rock-techno-y duo from the UK, and up till now you've probably heard them (thank you, Steve Jobs). They are AWESOME though. I just wanted to bring them to your attention. They're awesome. Yes. Below are there songs "That's Not My Name", "Great DJ" and "Shut Up and Let Me Go". All great. All awesome. Go them.

Their album, We Started Nothing, is apparently in stores May 19th.
*starts line in front of Target*

The Nearest Book

2008-05-11T04:47:00.004-04:00

Because the glorious Nathaniel of The Film Experience tagged me to do this -- and who am I to reject him? -- I'm doing it. Why not? The rules:

1. Pick up the nearest book.
2. Open to page 123.
3. Locate the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences on your blog and in so doing...
5. Tag five people, and acknowledge who tagged me.

Okay, let me see around here... I'm in the den, where we keep the books in my house, so this shouldn't be hard... oh look, Juno: The Shooting Script, the custom DVD edition only available with the 2-Disc Special Edition with Digital Copy! Yay! But, wait - no page numbers. Well, there goes the excitement. *sigh* What else is around here...? Almanac? No. Encyclopedia? No. The Bible? *laughs uncontrollably* No. Hm, what's this? *blows on cover, dust flying everywhere* GASP!

BRIDGE TO FUCKING TERABITHIA!!!!!

In case you didn't know, Bridge to Terabithia is a milestone for me: the first (and only) book I've ever read more than once of my own volition, and also the only book to date I've read before the announcement of a major motion picture adaptation. Here's the excerpt, talking about and spoken by May Belle, Jesse's little sister.

"I had to do some things." She was scraping mud on her bare legs. "I just wanted to find you, so you wouldn't be so lonesone."

Yeah, as you might be aware, that's deep, deep into spoiler territory, and is actually five pages until the book ends. But I love this book so much. It's so devastating too; 10 year-old me never saw it coming, and it still attacks my tear ducts (such as the film did -- they were like broken faucets for the entire third act). If you've read/seen it, you know why. No reason in saying it here.

As for tagging... I bequeath Nick, Matt, DL, Catherine, and Dave, five of my bestest blog mates, or at least in my cute deranged mind. :)

Words of Wisdom

2008-05-10T23:01:00.002-04:00

“The world is messed-the-fuck-up, yo.”

-- Me, 3 minutes ago.

These Days

2008-05-10T01:12:00.004-04:00

This, um, in: I'm a LAMMY Award-winning blogger!

BOOYAH!

Oh yeah, this is good. This is gooooooood. WHOO!

Less good news, and you probably already know this by now: There's gonna be a sequel to Donnie Darko. (via, via)

Okay, um... sure, this doesn't make sense. And is probably only for money and manipulation. And it's probably an abomination of sense and a blight towards the natural order. But:

Daveigh Chase in a lead role!

Did you hear me, people?

Daveigh Chase in a lead role!

That's right.

Daveigh Chase in a lead role!

So stop bitching and go cry in the corner.

Also, Paranoid Park was fucking incredible. It's beautiful. It's moody. It's brilliant. It's perfect. It's still occupying most of my thoughts. I love you, Gus Van Sant.

And Angela Lansbury gave me a brutal, insanely painful hand injury. Don't ask me to make sense of that. Seriously - don't.

How's your life been?

Stephen Colbert on Speed Racer

2008-05-06T20:58:00.004-04:00

"Now, if you want a feel for what this movie is like, here's all you do, okay? Put eighty pounds of fireworks into an industrial dryer, crawl right in there with them, turn it on and then light the fuse. It'll give you a good idea of the visual onslaught you'll be enduring. It's a good movie, and I enjoyed myself. It's the classic story of boy meets seizure inducing lights. My one criticism of this movie: it stars Rain.

RRRAAAAAAIIIIIIINNNNN!!!!!!

So, Rain, now that you're a big movie star, I just finished writing a screenplay of a movie I think you'd be perfect for. It’s called Speed Racer II: Under the Car. It's two hours of a car repeatedly backing over Rain. Boffo box office!"

Friday... Friday... Friday...

This Is Probably Just My Emo Hyperbole, But...

2008-05-06T05:43:00.002-04:00

The video for Flyleaf's "All Around Me" is perhaps the best music video I've ever seen. Brilliantly thought-out, exceptional editing, fucking incredible photography. It's epic.

And of course, the song itself, which has one of the most awesome choruses ever and is one of the most goddamn addictive things I've ever heard. Even if it might be about God. I won't hold that against it, though.

And I love her hair. That is all.

Hello, Slaves. I Am Joe Wright, Your New Ruler.

2008-05-05T07:00:00.010-04:00

At the quarterly investors meeting early last month, control of Joe's Movie Corner was unceremoniously shifted over to moi due to a completely unrelated disappearance of other shareholders. Why did I want it? Because I wanted to hijack a blog, and this has my name in the title, so, yeah. In the agreement, it was stated that J.D. would still control JMC for another month to get situated for the takeover (which is now), which therefore explains his off-key posting regiment and the Atonement post *nudge-wink-cocks gun-points at skull*.

I don't know what I'll do to this place - if anything at all - but I'm here now.

As is my first lady.
Don't say it.

And my mistress.
Don't tell my first lady.

And my executive cabinet.
Yes, we're anti-ageist.

And my own personal Deadly Viper Assassination Squad.
They're interesting at parties.

And don't forget our mandatory propaganda!

ALL HAIL THE ROMANTIC REGIME!

^_^
And P.S. to DL of The Cellar Door:

Very subtle, man... but I'm on to you...

BACK TO WORK, PROLETARIATS

Are You There, God? It's Me, Giraffe.

2008-05-04T08:42:00.020-04:00

OMG.
I suck.

Discuss.

I conveyed so much!

10 Things I Learned from My 77th Viewing of Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind

2008-05-02T00:05:00.000-04:00

1. Pacifists on the edge are always fun to watch.

2. Flying is awesome.

3. Don't wear flesh-colored stockings.

4. Killing only breeds more killing.

5. Explosions rule.

6. Manipulation is okay if it's done for good.

7. Jesus allegories are always better when they're not Jesus allegories.

8. I love this movie.

9. Acid hurts.

10. Alison Lohman's Nausicaä is now my favorite performance ever.

~~ That is all. ~~

My Thoughts on The Orphanage

2008-04-27T10:50:00.012-04:00

Belén Rueda.

Belén Rueda.

OMFG

BELÉN REUDA.

Which, coincidentally, is similar to my thoughts on Away from Her, Black Book, La Vie en Rose and Lust, Caution. Coincidentally. *tee-hee*

I Just Wanted To Bring This To Your Attention

2008-04-27T05:24:00.003-04:00

I love this world sometimes.
(via IMP)

ETA And this for that matter...

Baaaaaaaaaaaaa

2008-04-26T02:09:00.003-04:00

For your consideration, all you LAMB bitches.
Please?

Yeah. So. Baby Mama.

2008-04-25T22:24:00.004-04:00

Um...

*gulp*

...it ain't that great.

I didn't see this coming. I really didn't. My blinding mega-love for Tina and Amy must've distracted me from the fact that Tina didn't write this... which, as this seems to prove, is her real key.

Don't get me wrong; it's good, and semi-perfect for a sort of generic popcorn movie. But it's first third is annoyingly forced and unfunny. So much so, that by the time it does get mega-hilarious (which it does), it feels like it's too late, which left a weird and unfamiliar taste in my mouth.

But have no fear! 'Cuz Tina & Amy are comically brilliant. Especially Amy. Sure, the material isn't the best they've ever uttered - duh - but they're so awesome and transcendent and divine that they'll be funny doing anything. Ever.

We're infallible, baby.
Oh, and Sigourney Weaver is brilliant. That is all. *cries a little bit*

3 Random Thoughts, Nice & Short

2008-04-25T04:17:00.003-04:00

1. Today I watched Band of Outsiders, took a shower, and then saw Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day. I know what you're thinking.

... Quoi?
Yeah, I know you speak in French.
And you won't believe this, but this isn't the first time something like this has happened! A little over a month ago, I saw The 400 Blows for the first time (<3), and then went to see The Other Boleyn Girl. What the hell is wrong with me? Discuss.

2. Whenever I think about it, I always seem to say that Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind is the greatest film ever made. What the hell is wrong with me? Discuss.

3. I need some help: Can someone tell me whether or not "The Hill" from Once is original to the film? Like, for realz? 'Cuz I'm not entirely sure. I really, really want it to be - because it's the 2nd best song from it, and is almost as excellent to "Falling Slowly" IMO (which is tough) - but the whole debate confuses me, and I haven't heard anything on the song specifically. There's nothing wrong with me - I'm just confused. Discuss.

A Message from Alexandra Maria Lara

2008-04-23T12:21:00.001-04:00

Thanks to Nick for the awesome news.

Just Paranoid

2008-04-22T22:07:00.009-04:00

You really have no idea how much I've become obsessed with wanting to see Paranoid Park. The fact I can't yet because I have no idea when I can (though according to Dipson's site it's "coming soon", which could mean any number of things) is just sort of painful. I can't explain it. It just looks so extremely brilliant. I love Elephant. I've started sucking my thumb again. I NEED THIS MOVIE. *fetal position* ~fin~

UPDATE, Thursday @ 3 pm: IT'S AT THE DIPSON NORTH PARK STARTING TOMORROW!!!!!! OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!!!!

2008-04-22T19:31:00.010-04:00

KILL

IS

LOVE

An Open Letter to... Juliette Binoche

2008-04-21T04:01:00.010-04:00

Dear Ms. Binoche,

I just saw Dan in Real Life.

What the hell?

No, it's not that you chose to do this -- a sappy, predictable, sort of awkward romantic comedy -- in the wake of such Euro-centric art-house stuff like Caché, Breaking & Entering and Flight of the Red Balloon. But instead because, well:

YOU WERE AMAZING
I can't quite wrap my mind around it. I mean, I know you're one of the best actresses ever to angelically grace cinema screens... but I guess I've only now realized how deep it ran.

It all started with your heartbreaking and heartfelt performance in Breaking & Entering. The film completely surprised me with how wonderful it was, but your Amira was surely the best thing about it. The amount of compassion and sympathy you brought to a character that could've easily been written off as an evil bitch (complete with a Bosnian/Muslim back-story) is astonishing, and damn near unbelievable.

Then came your 1/18th of Paris, Je T'aime, which I think was easily the best and most unbelievably transcendent part of the film. I'd praise you for it s'more, but I already did that.

But, then... a little over a month ago... I saw... Blue...

HOLY
FRAKKING
MOTHER
OF
GOD
Julie, if I said you were incredible, I'd have to slap myself repeatedly, because THAT WOULD BE AN UNDERSTATEMENT, the likes of which I've rarely even THOUGHT of! Oh... OH... *bewildered giddy screeching*

Juliette: *coughs* Ahem.

Oh, um, sorry. *embarrassed*

Well, Ms. Binoche, I just wanted to inform you that you're my new hero. How you can do what you do and all you do, from Blue to Breaking & Entering to Dan in Real Life, with the same amount of enthusiasm and dignity is contradicting to what I thought the human race was capable of. You've restored, or reaffirmed the point of, with only a fragment of your career in hand, my faith in humanity. If you -- a heaven-sent woman, but a human woman nonetheless -- can be as excellent as you are, anyone can do pretty much anything.

Especially making Dane Cook seem tolerable. And that's, like, impossible.

Avec tout l'amour à mon coeur,
J.D.

My Thoughts on The Dreamers

2008-04-18T19:14:00.002-04:00

Holy frakking christ.
*faints*

CANTFRICKINWAIT: Australia

2008-04-18T19:01:00.010-04:00

This film is gonna be so drool-tastic, it's gonna make Moulin Rouge! look like a useless, hallucinogenic seizure, isn't it? Awesome!!!!!

2008-04-16T15:24:00.000-04:00

Atonement: A Tale of Three Brionys

2008-04-14T01:28:00.000-04:00

In my usual quest of writing the proper and extensive review the film deserves and I know I have in me, I wandered over to the hundreds (no joke) of screencaps I took the first night I had the DVD (the first day, obviously)... and let's say by the time this paragraph was written, I had about a hundred-hundred and fifty more. It's one of the most compelling films to watch, especially when you're trying to get enough screencaps, because there never seems to be enough. Needless to say, however strong Elswit and TWBB is in everyone else's eyes, and the ever-looming warfare of the two, McGarvey is most definitely the Cinematography Chloe, I'm telling you now. The oiled and sometimes Gothicly plastic look of the scenes gives the film what it's most known for and will likely be known for through the ages: a visual masterpiece. But to view it as such alone is asinine, and foolish. On my first two viewings, my respect for the screenplay was fueled mostly by the structure of the story, and not the dialogue itself, something I've since realized is false. Everything from the little moments to the big contain the same amount of humanity, depth and overall characteristic brilliance, something not all films can boast, no matter how great. There are some moments I love more than others, and I'd like to mention one: in the attempted apology scene, just before Robbie comes back into the room, Briony (Garai's interpretation) opens her cloak, exposing her uniform and the red of it's interior. I love this because she's opening what she was guarding moments before; showing her sister and the man she destroyed she is willing to take anything and everything they throw at her, bodily injury included, in the hopes that they can see she's truly repentant. And, arguably, Cecilia sees that; if you look closely throughout it, she looks forlorn and hate-filled, but she seems more tender than you'd think. Robbie, on the other hand, turns into a near-homicidal ranting mess, but deservedly so. Each of their reactions to each other makes the scene truly heart-wrenching, even though it was just another lie.

*where the FUCK did that come from?!?!?*
Well, anyway, this post is one of the most massive I've ever done, and I feel it shows how dedicated I am to the most random things. I really wish I could have a link that would off-shoot the post from the main page, like on WordPress and such, but I have no idea how to work that on Blogger. If someone could tell me how (because I know it's not impossible), that'd be excellent. So, this is pretty damn huge, and MAJORLY SPOILER-TASTIC. Which is barely a word, but whatever. Despite the assumed frivolity of this, I feel it's actually pretty appropriate. There are no better words to explain why I love the film than the words of the film itself. So, please, my epic... Atonement: A Tale of Three Brionys...

Briony Tallis, age 13.

"Cee? What do you think it would feel like to be someone else?"

"If you write a story, you only have to say the word 'castle,' and you could see the towers and the woods and the village below, but... in a play, it's... it all depends on other people."

"Well... it's about how love is all very well, but you have to be sensible."

"If you're going to be Arabella, then I'll be the director, thank you very much."

"How awful."

"Cecilia!"

"I've done nothing wrong."

"Yes, I saw him, I saw him with my own eyes."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Briony Tallis, age 18.

"There is no Briony."

"I almost jumped out of my skin."

"No. I don't know."

"It's complicated. It's just... it's about a young girl, a young and foolish girl, who sees something from her bedroom window which she doesn't understand, but she thinks she does. I probably won't ever finish it."

"Dear Cecilia. Please don't throw this away without reading it. As you'll have seen from the notepaper, I'm her at St. Thomas' doing my nurses' training. I decided not to take up my place at Cambridge. I decided I wanted to make myself useful. Do something practical. No matter how hard I work, no matter how long the hours, I can't escape from what I did and what it meant, the full extent of which I'm only now beginning to grasp. Cee, please write and tell me we can meet. Your sister, Briony."

"I've never been in love. Oh, I had a crush once, when I was 10 or 11. I jumped into a river to see if he'd save me from drowning. Oh, no. And he did save me. But as soon as I told him I loved him, the feeling sort of disappeared."

I just wanted to post this.
This, the most obvious visual metaphor I've ever seen.
And yet... it completely works.

"Robbie."

"She will soon, I hope."

"Yes."

"Briony. Je m'appelle Briony."

(from memory) "I saw him. I know it was him. I saw him. I saw him with my own eyes."

"I tried writing. You wouldn't answer. I have to talk to you."

"Well, I wanted to see you first."

"No. No. No. Yes. But yes and no."

"Growing up."

"It wasn't Danny Hardman. It was Leon's friend, Marshall."

"I am very, very sorry for the terrible distress that I have caused."

"I am very, very sorry."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Briony Tallis, age 77.

"I'm sorry, could we stop for a moment?"

(deep sigh)

"It's my last novel."

"I'm dying. My doctor tells me I have something called vascular dementia, which is essentially a series of tiny strokes. Your brain closes down, gradually you lose words, you lose your memory, which for a writer is pretty much the point."

"So that's why I could finally write the book, I think. I had to. And why, of course, it's my last novel."

"Strangely enough, it would be just as accurate to call it my first novel. I wrote several drafts as far back as my time at St. Thomas' during the War. I just couldn't ever find the way to do it."

"Yes, entirely. I haven't changed any names, including my own."

"No. I had, for a very long time, decided to tell the absolute truth. No rhymes, no embellishments."

"And I think... You've read the book, you'll understand why."

"I got first-hand accounts of all the events I didn't personally witness, the conditions in prison, the evacuation to Dunkirk, everything."

"But the effect of all this honesty was rather pitiless. You see, I couldn't any longer imagine what purpose would be served by it."

"By honesty. Or reality."

"Because, in fact, I was too much of a coward to go and see my sister in June, 1940. I never made that journey to Balham. So the scene in which I confess to them is imagined. Invented."

"And, in fact, could never have happened. Because..."

"Robbie Turner died of septicemia at Bray-Dunes on June the first, 1940, the last day of the evacuation."

"And I was never able to put things right with my sister, Cecilia, because she was killed on the 15th of October, 1940, by the bomb that destroyed the gas and water mains above Balham tube station."

"So... my sister and Robbie were never able to have the time together they both so longed for, and deserved."

"And which, ever since, I've... Ever since I've always felt I prevented."

"But what sense of hope, or satisfaction, could a reader derive from an ending like that?"

"So, in the book, I wanted to give Robbie and Cecilia what they lost out on in life."

"I'd like to think this isn't weakness or... evasion..."

"But a final act of kindness."

"I... gave them... their happiness."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Joined by love.

Separated by fear.

Redeemed by hope.

A film by Joe Wright

ATONEMENT.

One of My Favorite Scenes of All Time

2008-04-13T20:46:00.002-04:00

While randomly prowling YouTube, I came across the clip of the (very spoiler-y) 2nd act conclusion of Atlantis: The Lost Empire, one of my favorite movies of all time. It's just visually and aurally incredible to a degree that doesn't seem possible at all. The light-play! Those sound effects! The score! Which is also one of my absolute favorites... and every time I hear another one of your scores, Mr. Howard, I'm thinking of this (even - somehow - Michael Clayton). It's also my winner for Animated Feature that year, and one of my favorite examples of the idiocy of AMPAS -- Jimmy Neutron? Seriously? I mean, I love that movie too, but... WTF? -- and it has, along with Lilo & Stitch, taught me [sadistically] that Disney can still be great... even if they flagrantly choose not to be. I'm sorry, what was I talking about? ~ fin ~

You Stupid Bitch

2008-04-11T19:02:00.003-04:00

I love Donnie Darko with all my fucking heart and think it's some of the most brilliant stuff any film has ever come up with. But, despite that, I've come to realize that what Richard Kelly wrote was actually an autobiography. And Frank is actually Southland Tales.

I just can't figure out if what I saw was the best thing I've ever seen or the worst. I really can't. I honestly have no idea if I can even manage to talk about it right now without repeatedly saying "*bewildered screech*"!

So I won't.

But what I do know is -- and I'm pretty damn sure of this -- Bai Ling is the craziest whore the human race has ever known. And I'm honestly glad she says she's from the Moon, because now I can say "Yeah, we're a horrible, disgusting species who does horrible, disgusting things, but at least we didn't spawn Bai Ling!"

I love you, you lunatic.

But What About the Children?!?!

2008-04-11T02:57:00.012-04:00

There's a line in La Vie en Rose I've really found myself obsessed with: It's around 20 minutes in, and Édith is at a party and everybody's drunk and she spilled the champagne because she's retarded or something and she spouts out this gem...

"I am Édith Piaf, and I've made a mess."
Omgmarioncotillardisedithpiaf!™ doesn't get much better than that, people. edit: That is all.

The Most Concise Graphic I've Ever Seen

2008-04-10T20:17:00.001-04:00

Thank you, JA. Very, very much.

Alex Etel is Super Mega Adorable

2008-04-10T01:38:00.000-04:00

Please see Millions now. I'm not kidding.

Marcel. Marcel. Oh, Marcel. Marcel.

2008-04-06T00:36:00.002-04:00

Friday, I got a very bad stomach flu.

Yesterday, I decided to re-watch La Vie en Rose, and I have finally come to terms with my seriously freaky love for it. Marion is back up as my Actress Gold -- which will never be conclusive. I've also realized that it's very technically brilliant, especially the cinematography.

Right now, it feels like my face is melting off the bone of my skull.

Coincidence? I think not...

2008-04-05T10:43:00.001-04:00

Holy Christ.

I Better Not Die In My Sleep Tonight

2008-04-03T15:15:00.001-04:00

'Coz 4 Months, 3 Weeks & 2 Days opens in the Buffalo area tomorrow!

This Post Is Brought To You By The Letter "♥"

2008-04-03T04:14:00.016-04:00

I love romance movies. I don't know why, but I always have. Even if they're not really romantic, or even about the love story itself. And ESPECIALLY if it's tragic, because that's my shit right there. And the films of that variety also tend to be of a better nature. Like, if the main couple does experience a happy ending, it's rarely ever a great movie, at least comparatively to the otherwise, right? It scarcely feels completely genuine or right, or anything but formulaic. So let's discuss some of my favorite tragic romances, because I'm in a really fucking random mood. And there are some pretty big spoilers present. Yeah.

^_^
Arguably, my favorite would have to be, and probably really stupidly, Titanic. First off, I love that movie to death, despite my better logic. It's just so... perfect, and there's no better reason (or excuse, depending on your stance) for it than Jack and Rose, aka LEO AND KATE OMG. Ugh. So... much... aching... ROMANTICISM...

^_^
Princess Mononoke is one of the films closest to my heart, for I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be the same person without it. I think I first saw it when I was 8, and it opened about 5 billion doors at once, some of which I'm still realizing are open. Among them is the Ghibli/Miyazaki door, the Epics door, the War Movies door, the Proper Anime door, the Mature Films door, the Japanese door, the Joe Hisaishi Is The Master Of The Universe door (didn't realize that was open till Tuesday), the Claire Danes door, etcetera, etcetera... the list goes on. It's a huge milestone in my life, and it deserves nothing less than my utmost respect and familial worshiping. Despite some serious flaws in it's U.S. parts (the writing, the casting, the Weinsteins -- *shudders*), it makes those microscopic grievances implode with it's awesome beauty (some of the most gorgeous images I've ever seen), excellent story and impeccable nobility.

But back on topic.

Sure, it's not really much of a love story; it's predominately about the war between mankind and nature. But it never really denies the deeper link between Ashitaka and San, but it never says it outright until very near the climax, and literally too. And absolutely it's not a tragic ending for them, it would be incredibly pessimistic to think so -- he going back to humanity to help rebuild Irontown, she back into the forest with her brothers because she is never able to forgive them for what they've done, even if they were apologetic about it -- but of course it's not that much of a happy ending either. But they're still in love, and they know it, and they'll still keep in touch. And if it weren't for the fact they just saved the world, I'd say the quasi-bestiality was weird. But whatever, their lives are their lives.

^_^
One last mega-tragic love story I wanna talk about is probably a weird choice... but, like my thoughts on the film, it's the point to think of it in a sadistically positivel light... Children of Men. I mean it! Think about it. Theo and Julian obviously love each other, even if they don't wanna go back to those days -- why would you? -- and move through their separate nows as such... she's the political activist and he's a zombie. All works out. But then, through the miracle of Kee and the quest to save her from a world unready to handle something as formerly wondrous and mundane as her "condition" has become, she calls upon him once again to help them get transit papers for her through his cousin. He's hesitant, and a little pissed, at this plea, mostly because his life sucks and the coffee shop he was just in exploded earlier in the week. Their meeting breeds one of my favorite pieces of dialogue ever:

Y'know that ringing in your ears? That 'eeeeeeeeee'? That's the sound of the ear cells dying, like their swan song. Once it's gone you'll never hear that frequency again. Enjoy it while it lasts.

Added with the poignancy of the words, the brilliance of the wandering wide-shot, and Moore's effective and affected handling of Julian (in this scene and all), it makes the... um...

... inevitable ...
all the more shocking and disorienting, which is completely the point.

Back on topic.

What happened happened. The pain never went away, and any sort of rekindling they might have been feeling because of this all-too-short reunion was stung with the bitter remembrance of it. But they also remember who they were, and what they used to do together, and how much they loved each other. The ball scene proves this -- the sentimentalism, the nostagia, the awesomeness that they could do that. They ended on a high note, the last hurrah to what made them both. And so, Theo was in way deeper than he wanted to be in this journey, leading to the deception, the horrors, the warfare, and the last one turning out the film's light... all because of her and what she meant to him.

But seriously, that ball thing was awesome!

^_^
So, in short, I can write deep and meaningful things, but apparently only on the films I know and love the most. And also when I'm not trying to. I have no idea why I wanted to make this post... I just did.

^_^

I Have A Question (If Anyone Has An Answer)

2008-04-01T02:29:00.001-04:00

I love the Halloweentown movies. Well, mostly, but still. And I really do, always have and always will, love Kimberly J. Brown because of Marnie (and, honestly, Quints). But then, of course, they had to continue the series... without her. I have no idea why they did it, why it happened, or why they got Sarah Paxton. They don't even look alike, now do they? Especially how Sarah is sort of retardedly skinny. Kimberly wasn't the skinniest young actress, sure, but to replace her with a stick and then to just assume kids won't notice? Yikes.

Anyway, my question to all of you, my wonderful readers, or anyone who stumbles upon this place, if you know it, is why? Did Kimberly turn it down? Was she forced to say no? Did they flat-out abandon her? Did they try to turn this into a vehicle for Sarah? Is God just trying to piss me off?! I'd really like to know. But no guarantee that I won't still be pissed about it. *resentment*

How do you like it in there, you fat cow?!

My Bookie Is Gonna Break My Knees, I Know It!

2008-03-31T13:38:00.006-04:00

For this year's Actress Psychic Contest @ The Film Experience, I decided to do something I didn't last year: Enter it, of course! Last year I didn't, sadly (read: THANK GOD). I had both Natalie and Scarlett on my draft for The Other Boleyn Girl. *embarrassed by somewhat disturbing fanboy tendencies*

Anyway... I did indeed enter this year! And if you look close enough, you can find me on there...

Oh, yeah, great. There goes the sly positive of semi-anonymity! I hate you, me. Well, since the inconsiderate Joeyocentric cat is out the bag, why not just tell you why I chose them, eh? And guess what?

FANBOY ALERT!
Emily Blunt in The Young Victoria
Witness the one Fanboy J.D. wants in the most. Yup, even more than the other four. Listen, she needs this nomination. He's still pissed off that she missed for The Devil Wears Prada, despite being understanding of why it didn't happen), which is definitely one of the best comic performances of the decade.

"No. Shan't."

BRILLIANT. But all sides of J.D. thinks she deserves to be a helluva lot more famous, and this might bring it to her. (drctly rltd) I especially love the fact this is in the realm of possibility! Yay the realm of possibility! I like you!

Sally Hawkins in Happy-Go-Lucky
The reviews out of Berlin have been very strong, and she also won the Silver Bear for Best Actress. It's a Mike Leigh film, and he's good with getting actresses nominated. I think. I mean, Staunton also had festival buzz and awards... but that was Venice, a whole 6 months down the calendar. And she's not as known, but that could work with the "new girl" slot. Or not. Maybe I didn't think this through. Maybe a lot of people didn't think this through. Well, we'll see, I guess.

Keira Knightley in The Duchess
I know what you're thinking:

"You're an idiot."

And you're right! I believe this is Fanboy J.D. being an irrational twit. I actually didn't realize how stupid of a choice this was until after I sent it. Oops! It's not gonna happen. August/September release date, no-name director, the fact it's Keira. It's not entirely impossible, mind you. It seems like it could be, if the film is worth something, a very juicy role that could breed a very strong performance out of her, and one that could bring in raves. The odds of her getting enough and then having them last the long dry fall into legitimate buzz... *sigh*

Meryl Streep in Doubt
There's really nothing I can say on her that been said, insinuated, or thought. Inevitable? Pretty much, yeah. So, um...

Kate Winslet in Revolutionary Road
Now this, thankfully, is where the chaotic streams of Fanboy J.D. and Rational J.D. merge into the Great Winslut River, a beautiful nirvana of an aquatic road. Like Streep, nothing really needs to be said. But...

BOO-YAH!

*ahem*
Fanboy J.D. wishes he could've included...

Anne Hathaway. Mostly Anne Hathaway. 99% Anne Hathaway. But, now, it doesn't make sense. Well, it doesn't! She's one of my very favorite actresses (and was better in Ella Enchanted than La Skank in M$B, I'll say it) and I would love love love love love love if I could see that oh-so-desired prefix in front of her name, but I've always feared that it's never gonna happen. She hasn't gotten the respect she deserves, despite numerous failed attempts at headlining a movie -- I mean, of the three major films she has first billing for, Becoming Jane is probably her most important, for f*ck's sake.

And Dancing with Shiva and her role in it seem incredibly intriguing, honestly. But I get a lot of Margot at the Wedding (minus asexual kid and manipulative bitchiness) vibes reading it's plot description, which makes me sad, confused, scared and pre-disappointed.

*sigh*

I'm gonna suck at this, ain't I? Mm. Ah, well. Such is life.

So, did you try out your psychic skills for it? Do you wanna tell me who you're predicting anyway? Do you wanna give me some sleeping pills?
Because that'd work too.

Because She Makes Me Smile

2008-03-31T09:17:00.000-04:00

I AM A B-LIST BLOGGER!!!!!

2008-03-28T18:34:00.004-04:00

A.W.E.S.O.M.E.
*cough* Finally. *cough*

Join the Church of the Holy Linney today!
Doooooooooo iiiiit!

Carice Van Hot-Ten

2008-03-28T00:35:00.005-04:00

I have no idea what is going on in this still from Dorothy Mills (I don't know either, but it sounds like Stephanie Daley meets The Silence of the Lambs in Ireland? or something), but is Carice lookin' foxy or WHAT? *drools*

OMG...

2008-03-27T23:09:00.001-04:00

ZOMBIE!!!!!!!!!!

Well, an extremely talented and, um, beautiful actress-zombie, but a zombie nonetheless.

*GASP!*

Saoirse!

AAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

GET OUT OF THE CAR, SAOIRSE!!

GET OUT OF THE CAR!!!!!!!!!

~ later that night ~

Well, that was scary.

It certainly was, honey.

Now come to bed.

~ fin ~
(pic src)

250 Minutes to Save the World

2008-03-25T20:28:00.024-04:00

Sorry for my lack of, um, un-neglect of this place. I've just really been out of it recently pertaining to blogging. It's just been slipping away from me, further and further each day...

Anyway... inspired by Princess Jackass, here is the complete IMDb Top 250 Films list (as of 3/25/08 @ approx. 6:00 pm EDT) and all the films I've seen on it in bold red. Which is 62. Which means I rock.

1. The Godfather (1972)
2. The Shawshank Redemption (1994)
3. The Godfather: Part II (1974)
4. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly (1966)
5. Pulp Fiction (1994)
6. Schindler's List (1993)
7. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest (1975)
8. Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980)
9. Casablanca (1942)
10. Seven Samurai (1954)
11. Star Wars (1977)
12. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
13. 12 Angry Men (1957)
14. Rear Window (1954)
15. Goodfellas (1990)
16. City of God (2002)
17. Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)
18. Once Upon a Time in the West (1968)
19. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
20. The Usual Suspects (1995)
21. Psycho (1960)
22. Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)
23. Fight Club (1999)
24. The Silence of the Lambs (1991)
25. Citizen Kane (1941)
26. North by Northwest (1959)
27. Memento (2000)
28. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)
29. Sunset Blvd. (1950)
30. It's a Wonderful Life (1946)
31. The Matrix (1999)
32. Lawrence of Arabia (1962)
33. Se7en (1995)
34. Apocalypse Now (1979)
35. Taxi Driver (1976)
36. American Beauty (1999)
37. The Professional (1994)
38. There Will Be Blood (2007)
39. Vertigo (1958)
40. Amélie (2001)
41. American History X (1998)
42. The Departed (2006)
43. Paths of Glory (1957)
44. M (1931)
45. No Country for Old Men (2007)
46. To Kill a Mockingbird (1962)
47. The Third Man (1949)
48. Chinatown (1974)
49. The Lives of Others (2006)
50. A Clockwork Orange (1971)
51. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
52. Alien (1979)
53. The Treasure of the Sierra Madre (1948)
54. The Shining (1980)
55. Pan's Labyrinth (2006)
56. The Pianist (2002)
57. Spirited Away (2001)
58. Double Indemnity (1944)
59. Forrest Gump (1994)
60. Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)
61. Saving Private Ryan (1998)
62. L.A. Confidential (1997)
63. Das Boot (1981)
64. The Bridge on the River Kwai (1957)
65. Requiem for a Dream (2000)
66. Reservoir Dogs (1992)
67. Downfall (2004)
68. Aliens (1986)
69. The Maltese Falcon (1941)
70. Raging Bull (1980)
71. Rashômon (1950)
72. Metropolis (1927)
73. Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)
74. Modern Times (1936)
75. Singin' in the Rain (1952)
76. Hotel Rwanda (2004)
77. Sin City (2005)
78. Rebecca (1940)
79. 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)
80. The Seventh Seal (1957)
81. All About Eve (1950)
82. Some Like It Hot (1959)
83. City Lights (1931)
84. Amadeus (1984)
85. On the Waterfront (1954)
86. Life is Beautiful (1997)
87. The Great Escape (1963)
88. Touch of Evil (1958)
89. The Prestige (2006)
90. The Elephant Man (1980)
91. Full Metal Jacket (1987)
92. Jaws (1975)
93. The Sting (1973)
94. Cinema Paradiso (1988)
95. Once Upon a Time in America (1984)
96. The Apartment (1960)
97. The Manchurian Candidate (1962)
98. Braveheart (1995)
99. The Great Dictator (1940)
100. Blade Runner (1982)
101. Strangers on a Train (1951)
102. Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (1939)
103. Batman Begins (2005)
104. Bicycle Thieves (1948)
105. High Noon (1952)
106. Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi (1983)
107. The Big Sleep (1946)
108. The Wages of Fear (1953)
109. Notorious (1946)
110. The Wizard of Oz (1939)
111. Back to the Future (1985)
112. Ran (1985)
113. Oldboy (2003)
114. Fargo (1996)
115. Unforgiven (1992)
116. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)
117. Donnie Darko (2001)
118. Princess Mononoke (1997)
119. Cool Hand Luke (1967)
120. Ratatouille (2007)
121. Kill Bill Vol. 1 (2003)
122. For A Few Dollars More (1965)
123. Yojimbo (1961)
124. The Green Mile (1999)
125. Million Dollar Baby (2004)
126. The Bourne Ultimatum (2007)
127. Nights of Cabiria (1957)
128. Gladiator (2000)
129. Into the Wild (2007)
130. Die Hard (1988)
131. The Battle of Algiers (1966)
132. Annie Hall (1977)
133. Ben-Hur (1959)
134. The Deer Hunter (1978)
135. It Happened One Night (1934)
136. The Sixth Sense (1999)
137. The General (1927)
138. Platoon (1986)
139. Life of Brian (1979)
140. Kind Hearts and Coronets (1949)
141. The Killing (1956)
142. Wild Strawberries (1957)
143. Amores Perros (2000)
144. Diabolique (1955)
145. Finding Nemo (2003)
146. The Incredibles (2004)
147. V for Vendetta (2005)
148. Heat (1995)
149. The Wild Bunch (1969)
150. Brief Encounter (1945)
151. Children of Men (2006)
152. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (1969)
153. The Graduate (1967)
154. 8½ (1963)
155. The Princess Bride (1987)
156. Judgment at Nuremberg (1961)
157. Letters from Iwo Jima (2006)
158. The Night of the Hunter (1955)
159. Juno (2007)
160. The Big Lebowski (1998)
161. Stand by Me (1986)
162. Crash (2004)
163. Dog Day Afternoon (1975)
164. Gandhi (1982)
165. Shadow of a Doubt (1943)
166. The Adventures of Robin Hood (1938)
167. Snatch (2000)
168. Harvey (1950)
169. Witness for the Prosecution (1957)
170. Kill Bill Vol. 2 (2004)
171. The Thing (1982)
172. The African Queen (1951)
173. Trainspotting (1996)
174. The Grapes of Wrath (1940)
175. Gone with the Wind (1939)
176. The Gold Rush (1925)
177. Groundhog Day (1993)
178. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)
179. Beauty and the Beast (1946)
180. Little Miss Sunshine (2006)
181. Scarface (1983)
182. The Conversation (1974)
183. American Gangster (2007)
184. Patton (1970)
185. Duck Soup (1933)
186. Toy Story (1995)
187. Twelve Monkeys (1995)
188. The Best Years of Our Lives (1946)
189. Nosferatu (1922)
190. The Terminator (1984)
191. Sleuth (1972)
192. The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920)
193. Umberto D. (1952)
194. The Hustler (1961)
195. Stalker (1979)
196. The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951)
197. Glory (1989)
198. Ed Wood (1994)
199. King Kong (1933)
200. Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998)
201. The Lion King (1994)
202. The Exorcist (1973)
203. Grave of the Fireflies (1988)
204. Grindhouse (2007)
205. The Lost Weekend (1945)
206. Spartacus (1960)
207. Bride of Frankenstein (1935)
208. All Quiet on the Western Front (1930)
209. The Ox-Bow Incident (1943)
210. The Lady Vanishes (1938)
211. Magnolia (1999)
212. Stalag 17 (1953)
213. In the Heat of the Night (1967)
214. Sunrise: A Song of Two Humans (1927)
215. Run Lola Run (1998)
216. The Philadelphia Story (1940)
217. Frankenstein (1931)
218. Big Fish (2003)
219. Out of the Past (1947)
220. Casino (1995)
221. Rosemary's Baby (1968)
222. Anatomy of a Murder (1959)
223. Bonnie and Clyde (1967)
224. Mystic River (2003)
225. Toy Story 2 (1999)
226. 3:10 to Yuma (2007)
227. Once (2006)
228. Rififi (1955)
229. A Christmas Story (1983)
230. Hot Fuzz (2007)
231. Infernal Affairs (2002)
232. Manhattan (1979)
233. Ikiru (1952)
234. A Streetcar Named Desire (1951)
235. Young Frankenstein (1974)
236. Dial M for Murder (1954)
237. Rope (1948)
238. The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance (1962)
239. Roman Holiday (1953)
240. In Cold Blood (1967)
241. His Girl Friday (1940)
242. The 400 Blows (1959)
243. Shaun of the Dead (2004)
244. Hero (2002)
245. La Strada (1954)
246. Harold and Maude (1971)
247. Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)
248. The Searchers (1956)
249. Le Samouraï (1967)
250. Barry Lyndon (1975)

What's your Top 250 score?

Dear Harvey

2008-03-23T19:33:00.000-04:00

I hate you.

Signed,
J.D.

2008 -- #5 Funny Games U.S.

2008-03-14T00:00:00.008-04:00

#5 Funny Games U.S.
Starring Naomi Watts, Tim Roth, Michael Pitt and Brady Corbet
Directed by Michael Haneke
From Warner Independent
Might Be Released on ~~March 14th~~ um... today
And this, ladies and gentleman, is the most perplexing movie I've ever wanted to rlllllly see.

I have yet to see the original, and honestly, I don't want to. I hated the only film of Michael Haneke's I've seen, Caché. And, when I say hate, I mean HATE. It would probably dissolve if I ever see it again, but it's too fun hating something with all your being.

Naomi Watts is easily one of my favorite actresses of all time, and she has two performances (that'd be Ann Darrow and Betty/Diane) that would be in a list of my 25 favorite performances of all time (the latter might just be in the top 5). I really do love her. But I think, somewhere deep down inside, I have this freaky desire to watch her being tortured. It... intrigues me way too much. I have issues. And I love them. Which just makes make issues... it's cyclical! [broods]

But I think the major thing is that fucking trailer.

FUCKING

CHILLS
It actually makes me foam at the mouth. The adjectives! The adjectives! The adjectives! The adjectives!

Brilliant.
It's nowhere near wide this weekend (not surprising), but it's still in my area, and I think, with enough bribery, coercion and flat-out begging, I might see it this week. Ya never know...

2008 -- #6 Australia

2008-03-12T01:45:00.005-04:00

#6 Australia
Starring Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman
Directed by Baz Luhrmann
From 20th Century Fox (I assume)
Might Be Released on November 14th

*Warning: This post is in picture talk*
I'm really starting to like Nicole Kidman. It's about thiiiiis close to flat-out love, somewhat due to

for which she has my 2002 Supporting Actress. But mostly due to

despite the lack of a Gold medal for her in it (*ahem*). I love that movie too damn much, I'm telling you. Speaking of which, after that, Baz Luhrmann could make

and I'd see it opening day. Right hand to God. ♥♥♥

I also believe now Hugh Jackman can legitimately act, entirely due to

for which he has my 2006 Best Actor.

So, in short, how much do I want to see this?

2008 -- #7 Get Smart

2008-03-11T00:58:00.002-04:00

#7 Get Smart
Starring Steve Carell, Anne Hathaway, Dwayne "I'm Not The Rock Anymore, So Stop Calling Me That" Johnson, Terrence Stamp and Alan Arkin
Directed by Peter Segal
From Warner Bros.
Might Be Released on June 20th
Steve Carell is one of the funniest men on the planet. Anne Hathaway is one of the most gorgeous women on earth, and one of my favorite actresses. Put 'em all together and what do ya got? What could be a massive bomb. Or the funniest action blockbuster in years. I don't know. But I'm not sweatin' it at all. I mean, I dislike, what, 3% of things I see? And the odds this'll be in that 3% is about 30560:1, right? So I've got nothing to worry about! Also: Terrence Stamp scares me, in a "I'm going to hit you with a screwdriver" kind of way. I have no idea what that means, but it's how I feel!

Pure fierce.
I'm curious... how many of you at home are keeping up with this countdown? I'd like to hear it if you are.

WHY WON'T YOU RELEASE THIS?!?!

2008-03-10T23:54:00.002-04:00

Still no word on a possible release date. [/resentment]

2008-03-09T03:47:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday, Joe!

Thank you, Saoirse darling!

Saoirse?

Hm?

Why do you keep looking at me... like that?

Tell me you don't love it.

...

See?

...

I brought some friends of mine over tonight. They're helping with the party...

Hey, Joe.

...

I love you, Saoirse.

I know, honey.

I know.

2008 -- #8 Vicki Cristina Barcelona

2008-03-09T00:26:00.006-05:00

#8 Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Starring Scarlett Johansson, Rebecca Hall, Javier Bardem, Penélope Cruz and Patricia Clarkson
Directed by Woody Allen
From The Weinstein Company
Might Be Released on ... um?
There's so much to get excited about here: Super-mega-sexy Scarlett Johansson! Unfairly unknown Rebecca Hall (this better make her famous)! Academy Award-winner Javier Bardem! Academy Award-nominee Penélope Cruz (who looks like a crazy prostitute)! Woody Allen in international dramedy mode (suck it haters, Scoop was good)! HOT LESBIAN ACTION!!!!! How can someone not get excited by any of THAT?!?!?!

Seriously, this better make me famous.

2008 -- #9 My Blueberry Nights

2008-03-08T02:07:00.001-05:00

#9 My Blueberry Nights
Starring Norah Jones, Natalie Portman, David Strathairn and Rachel Weisz
Directed by Wong Kar Wai
From The Weinstein Company/MGM
Might Be Released on April 4th
I've already done this. So, instead, let's just focus on the pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty...

And, for good measure (and because it came up on the search and it's too damn awesome), a picture of Miss Jones on SESAME STREET.

Oh, sweet Jesus. *faints*

2008 -- #10 Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

2008-03-07T18:41:00.000-05:00

#10 Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
Starring Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint... and a helluva lot of legendary and distinguished British actors
Directed by David Yates
From Warner Bros.
Might Be Released on November 19th
This is low. Lower than it should be, isn't it? I guess it's because we're just so far from the release date, and it's still majorly in-production, that I can't get explicitly excited about it yet. But it's still Harry Potter, and I'm still excited.

2008-03-06T20:36:00.001-05:00

2008 -- #11 The Duchess

2008-03-05T03:31:00.003-05:00

#11 The Duchess
Starring Keira Knightley, Ralph Fiennes, Hayley Atwell, Dominic Cooper and Charlotte Rampling
Directed by Saul Dibb
From Paramount Vantage (Yay, they're getting diverse!)
Might Be Released on September 12th
The Duchess intrigues me because it seems, from the trailer at least, like a Marie Antoinette wannabe, only less stylistic, more plot and performance-driven, and probably less good. The main reason this is here though is obviously because of my fervent, sometimes delirious, love of Miss Knightley. And her in exquisite period garb is something that throws my ass in the seat like a rocket... ass. And my god, those freaking hats and wigs! They'd probably make Barbara Spooner blush! I mean, like wow. T'zall.

I Really Wish I Had HBO

2008-03-05T03:17:00.001-05:00

Damn.

2008 -- #12 The Reader

2008-03-04T05:06:00.003-05:00

#12 The Reader
Starring Ralph Fiennes and Kate Winslet
Directed by Stephen Daldry
From The Weinstein Company
Might Be Released on December 12th
This is the film I can see ruling the later months of my Anticipation charts, à la Atonement. It has all the elements that could actually make it reach that insane level too. Stephen Daldry is one of my favorite directors and his films (Billy Elliot and The Hours) are two of the greatest ever made, with three of my favorite performances ever (Bell, Walters, and Kidman). I really don't see how it'll be possible for him to mess up the perfect triangle that will be. It's about the Holocaust, it's edited by Claire Simpson (Chloe-winner for The Constant Gardener), and it stars Ralph Fiennes and Kate Winslet.

Kate Winslet.

Kate Winslet.

Kate Winslet.

Kate Winslet.

There's nothing left to say, really.

2008 -- #13 & #14 The Dark Knight/Iron Man

2008-03-04T04:06:00.003-05:00

#13 The Dark Knight
Starring Christian Bale, Heath Ledger, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Gary Oldman, Aaron Eckhart, Morgan Freeman, and Michael Caine
Directed by Christopher Nolan
From Warner Bros.
Might Be Released on July 18th

#14 Iron Man
Starring Robert Downey Jr, Gwyneth Paltrow, Terrence Howard and Jeff Bridges
Directed by Jon Favreau
From Paramount
Might Be Released on May 2nd
I've never ever ever been anywhere near being a comic book fan. And I'm generally ambivalent towards their adaptations (yet not graphic novels?). However, there are the occasional ones that get me genuinely excited. And these are surely two of them. Even though if it weren't for that fucking awesome teaser teaser, I really doubt I'd ever give a shit about Iron Man. I mean, Gwyneth Paltrow is in it, after all. But if there were ever a trailer to completely base a film off of... this'd be it.

The Dark Knight is perhaps, despite some overtness, a weirder thing for me to drool over. I never really wanted to see Batman Begins when it came out, and I still haven't. Don't worry though -- I promise you I will see it by July. Had I made this list, like, three weeks ago, this wouldn't be on here. And why? Because I only saw the trailer last week. And it started. Making. SENSE. *SCREAMS* I got why this has people orgasming in the streets! I got why people think Heath Ledger might actually win it and deserve it! I see it, I feel it, I know it now! EEEEEEEEEEEEE! I actually spasmed a bit in the theatre, myself. But, and this is me being an idiocentric conformist, why the hell didn't they just get Maggie to play Rachel in the first place and not risk BB having as many Razzie noms as Oscar noms? I mean, wtf?

And let me say this now: When I do this next year, expect Wolverine to pwn it. Srsly.

"Just tell me he's OKKAAAAAAAYYY!!!!!"

2008-03-03T02:02:00.004-05:00

Don't ask me how -- presumably God really is working to mess me up -- but the scene in Rendition where Reese overdramtically screamed in agony over her missing husband was actually pretty damn moving.

I know, I know... we're working on gettin' me that psychiatrist I so desperately need. That is all.

Sick Days

2008-02-28T17:41:00.001-05:00

I have the flu. And I don't really feel all that great about it. :(

2008 -- #15 Revolutionary Road

2008-02-27T17:07:00.009-05:00

#15 Revolutionary Road
Starring Leonardo DiCaprio, Kate Winslet, Michael Shannon and Kathy Bates
Directed by Sam Mendes (American Beauty, Jarhead)
From Paramount Vantage
Might Be Released on December 19th
In all rationalized thinking, this should be a lot higher, shouldn't it? For some reason, I can't actually get incredibly excited for this like most everyone else is. I think -- and it saddens me to say this -- it was the flood of "OMG ROSE AND JACK!!!!" enthusiasm when this was first announced. And I'm a staunch Titanic fanboy too. I know it has -nothing- to do with the plot or the characters or anything about it really, but GOD it was just too overwhelming annoying. Of course, I still want to see it. Kate and Leo are obviously excellent actors, and I'm a fan of Mr. Winslet's work as well. Hell, I even loved Jarhead! ...

Oh, just screw it.

KATE AND LEO OMG!!!!!

Summer Blockbusters and Wild Guesses

2008-02-26T23:27:00.006-05:00

Otherwise known as: JMC's 15 Most Anticipated Films of 2008!

Yup, that's right! With the 2007 season officially over with spectacular results, I thought I'd try to do an anticipation series again! 33 films were shortlisted, and from there 15 have made it, obviously. And films coming out between now and March 13th (10,000 BC, The Other Boleyn Girl, Penelope, Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day, Paranoid Park) that might've made the list will not be on it, because they'll be released as the list is announced, so that's a no-no.

Of the pool that didn't make the list, only one of them is really notable: Tales from Earthsea. Even though there is still no release date or plan to release it anytime soon, I just know if Hayao Miyazaki made this, it'd be like #3 on the list. But it's not. Apparently, his son Goro couldn't pull this off. That's pretty much the consensus, right? Maybe it's the exception that proves Ghibli's greatness. I don't know, and I probably won't until 2009! Oi.

Anyway, over the next fifteen days, we'll (I'll) be counting down our (my) most anticipated films supposedly coming out this year. The list is chockfull of visual effects overkill, iffy release dates, and the most perplexing thing I've ever wanted to reallllly see. So stay tuned!

Presented Without Comment

2008-02-25T15:13:00.000-05:00

OMG, It's Academy Award-Winner...

2008-02-25T01:35:00.001-05:00

Javier Bardem!

Diablo Cody!

Marion Cotillard!

Dario Marianelli!

Alexandra Byrne!

Tilda Swinton!

and, most importantly...

Markéta Irglová!

GREATEST. NIGHT. EVER.

I got 12 out of 21 right. A new personal low.

And I've never been so happy for doing so horribly.

LA VIE EST OSCAR!

Oil!

2008-02-24T19:56:00.001-05:00

For the first time ever -- and cutting it insanely close -- I have seen all five Best Picture nominees before the deadline called the Academy Awards. That's right.

I've finally seen There Will Be Blood.

It took me long enough, I know. But now that's over.

And?

PURPLE.

MONKEY.

DISHWASHER.
If you've paid any attention here at JMC, that's the same grade I gave Atonement. And by the time the fog clears, there might be another plus I can't see now. That's right.

This could be the best picture of the year.

DDDRRRRAAAAAAAIIIIIIIINNNNNNAAAAGGGGGEE!!!!!

A Message from Sarah Polley

2008-02-23T13:35:00.000-05:00

"It's Time That You Won..."

2008-02-23T13:10:00.003-05:00

In less than 31 hours, the crescendo of the cinematic year will thankfully occur. I've yet to get used to that. *glares at writers* We all had our pessimisms about what was going to happen tomorrow night, but THERE WILL BE OSCARS! And maybe blood, too. Ya know never know.

Here are my official and FINAL predictions for the 80th Academy Awards. updated w/ winners

BEST PICTURE
WILL WIN: No Country for Old Men
MIGHT WIN: There Will Be Blood
SHOULD WIN: Atonement

BEST DIRECTOR
WILL WIN: Joel & Ethan Coen, No Country for Old Men
MIGHT WIN: Paul Thomas Anderson, There Will Be Blood
SHOULD WIN: Joel & Ethan Coen

BEST ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE
WILL WIN: Daniel Day-Lewis, There Will Be Blood
MIGHT WIN: Daniel Day-Lewis
SHOULD WIN: Daniel Day-Lewis ~~(and I haven't even seen it yet!)~~

BEST ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE
WILL WIN: Julie Christie, Away from Her
MIGHT WIN: Marion Cotillard, La Vie en Rose
SHOULD WIN: Julie Christie

BEST ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE
WILL WIN: Javier Bardem, No Country for Old Men
MIGHT WIN: Hal Holbrook, Into the Wild
SHOULD WIN: Casey Affleck, The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford

BEST ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE
WILL WIN: Tilda Swinton, Michael Clayton
MIGHT WIN: ... uh ...
SHOULD WIN: Tilda Swinton

BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
WILL WIN: Juno (Diablo Cody)
MIGHT WIN: Michael Clayton (Tony Gilroy)
SHOULD WIN: Juno

BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
WILL WIN: No Country for Old Men (Joel & Ethan Coen)
MIGHT WIN: There Will Be Blood (Paul Thomas Anderson)
SHOULD WIN: Away from Her (Sarah Polley)

BEST ANIMATED FEATURE FILM
WILL WIN: Ratatouille
MIGHT WIN: Persepolis
SHOULD WIN: Ratatouille

BEST DOCUMENTARY FEATURE FILM
WILL WIN: No End in Sight
MIGHT WIN: Sicko
SHOULD WIN: n/a

BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM
WILL WIN: Das Fälscher
MIGHT WIN: 12
SHOULD WIN: n/a

BEST ART DIRECTION
WILL WIN: There Will Be Blood (Jack Fisk & Jim Erickson)
MIGHT WIN: Atonement (Sarah Greenwood & Katie Spencer)
SHOULD WIN: Atonement

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY
WILL WIN: No Country for Old Men (Roger Deakins)
MIGHT WIN: There Will Be Blood (Robert Elswit)
SHOULD WIN: Atonement (Seamus McGarvey)

BEST COSTUME DESIGN
WILL WIN: Atonement (Jacqueline Durran)
MIGHT WIN: Elizabeth: The Golden Age (Alexandra Byrne)
SHOULD WIN: I... I... [cries]

BEST EDITING
WILL WIN: No Country for Old Men ("Roderick Jaynes")
MIGHT WIN: The Bourne Ultimatum (Christopher Rouse)
SHOULD WIN: I don't know, um... The Bourne Ultimatum

BEST MAKE-UP
WILL WIN: La Vie en Rose
MIGHT WIN: Norbit [cries]
SHOULD WIN: La Vie en Rose

BEST ORIGINAL SCORE
WILL WIN: Atonement (Dario Marianelli)
MIGHT WIN: Michael Clayton (James Newton Howard)
SHOULD WIN: Atonement

BEST ORIGINAL SONG
WILL WIN: "Falling Slowly" (Once)
MIGHT WIN: "That's How You Know" (Enchanted)
SHOULD WIN: "Falling Slowly"

BEST SOUND MIXING
WILL WIN: Transformers
MIGHT WIN: No Country for Old Men
SHOULD WIN: ???

BEST SOUND EDITING
WILL WIN: Transformers
MIGHT WIN: The Bourne Ultimatum
SHOULD WIN: ???

BEST VISUAL EFFECTS
WILL WIN: Transformers
MIGHT WIN: The Golden Compass
SHOULD WIN: Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

UPDATED: 12/21 -- 57%

What do you think?

What's That?

2008-02-22T20:23:00.000-05:00

What's that? A hat!?
Crazy funky junky hat!
Overslept, hair unsightly
Tryin' to look like Keira Knightley
We've been there
We've done that
We see right through your funky hat!

You were saying?

A Message, As It Would Be When I Was 8

2008-02-19T18:32:00.001-05:00

Guess what I got today?

[...]

Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Halle-lujah!

"This moment... is so much bigger... than me!!!"

I'm fanatical.

Request of My Readers

2008-02-16T20:02:00.005-05:00

How many of you, my readers, have subscribed to my blog via BlogLines, Google Reader, or some kind of feed? I'm curious. Don't be afraid to tell me if you do. I'm goin' to bed...

6 Movies I've Watched Recently Instead of Blogging

2008-02-16T03:53:00.006-05:00

I think I'm charcoal. I may just be crispy bacon, but I doubt it.

My un-blogging is not really because of typical change -- my life is still the premature void it was before. But the changes are in what actually concerns you, here, now: My brain. There are less than 3 weeks until I turn 15. 15. But it's not that. It's really the fact that my brain is trying to set me up for a series of events that will lead me to, well, me.

I'm not me. You should know that.

The person I am in real life is not me. The person I am here isn't me either, even though it really should be. But I started my e-life off horribly. I could've very well been me now. But I'm not.

[sigh] God, it sucks being a teenager.

I'm thinking of abandoning this place. Not in a bad way, more like what Glenn did. There's really no point continuing to drive a car that is without an engine or gas and is prone to randomly combust. Not. Good. But whatever. It's probably not gonna happen for a while, because I actually have no idea how to continue JMC in another form.

Anywho...
Let's do some capsule reviews! I might as well; I've been itching to say some things about some of these films, and semi-sorta-not really reviewing is something I can do! In reverse order of me seeing them...

Rocket Science -- This, well, impressed me beyond all belief. It's not typical, but it's wonderfully anti-quirky. The lead, Reece Thomson, is pretty damn great and, as weird as it is, helped make an emotional connection to the film, which really shouldn't be there. I don't have a stutter. I'm not a freak! But there was something so basic about what Hal was going through and doing to fight it, only to ultimately stop and accept it, really struck a chord. I loved this movie. I really, really did. A- Now get off your asses and see it!

Roman Holiday -- OMG. Audrey Hepburn. OMG. Audrey Hepburn. OMG, AUDREY FRICKING HEPBURN. The film was pretty good too. A

[drools]
Becoming Jane -- I feared for this movie, since it's apparently not that good. Uh-uh. 'Tis. Very much so. Like, disturbingly good, actually. I don't know why, specifically. I love Anne Hathaway. I think James McAvoy is an excellent actor with admittedly focus-pulling eyes. I love British costume dramas. Julie Walters. Maggie Smith. Austenian melodrama. I can't explain it. Don't kill me. B+/A-

Definitely, Maybe -- I saw this at a free advance screening on Tuesday from Volition [nudge wink], the same company that also let me freely see Charlie Wilson's War (another film I wouldn't have seen in theatres otherwise). It's good. Surprising, to an extent. Though heavy-handed in it's nostalgicness (LOOK, AN ANCIENT CELL PHONE! IT'S 1992!!!! GET IT OMG!??!) and sometimes genuinely stupid, it made me love it (or as close as I could love it) with all it's cast. No, not Ryan Reynolds, you boob! HAH! Isla Fisher is heartbreakingly brilliant, Rachel Weisz is a hoot, Elizabeth Banks is beautifully restrained, Annie Parisse (why the trunk?!?!?!?), and Abby Breslin, who, even though I really don't agree with her Oscar nomination, is too frickin' adorable to even dislike. It's obvious who the mother is after the fact. though. But it doesn't even end there, and that last act SAVES this completely and without any room for doubt. Isla... dayam, girl! B

Stephanie Daley -- Amber Tamblyn. Wow. Wow. A-

And finally...

Atonement --

The. Fricking. End.
You can ask -any- question though about the film in the comments you feel needs to be asked because I owe it to you as a reader, and I will answer it to the best of my opinion, okay?

Now, I present to you the greatest song ever written, and it doesn't need an excuse to be here.

OH MY F**CKING GOD!!!

2008-02-12T00:44:00.000-05:00

You're probably wondering, "Why the hell is this little cretin showing us this godforsaken poster for that godforsaken movie?" As would I. But I just wanted to point something out I only now realized.

LMFAO!
I bet Murphy asks that to himself every single day of his life.

That is all.

Have I Ever Mentioned That I ♥ Z?

2008-02-09T23:32:00.000-05:00

Ya know, even though that's my, like, e-mail address? But I seriously do. Ever since House of Flying Daggers, it's been blinding and passionate. Oddly enough, Thursday was Chinese New Year. And I took note of that as "Post Pictures of Ziyi Zhang Day."

Well, guess what?

Happy 29th Birthday, My Love!

An Open Letter to... Most Everyone

2008-02-09T00:38:00.000-05:00

Dear Most Everyone,

... re: Emily Blunt ...
Why don't you recognize her as the force she is?

I mean, you went to see her in The Devil Wears Prada, and she even got some (completely deserved) attention for it, including a Golden Globe! She even won a non-related Golden Globe!

And her name is awesome in more ways than one's name should be!

So, again:

Why isn't she famous-famous yet?

I mean, she's sort of a name. I can -get- that. But she's nowhere near where she should be, is she?

She had quick, thankless and unmentioned roles in Charlie Wilson's War and Dan in Real Life last year (the former in which she was hella sexy), and absolutely terrific in The Jane Austen Book Club (which, if it wasn't SPC and were released wide, probably would've been a hit).

And this year she has the Sundance film Sunshine Cleaning (with Amy Adams) and The Young frickin' Victoria, which better get her that Oscar nomination she didn't get for TDWP. I don't see how it won't, actually.

You better get on it, America.
Being Threateningly Serious,
J.D.

Five Basic Thoughts on The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford

2008-02-07T15:28:00.000-05:00

1. It's pretty. Oh so very very beautiful. Like, seriously. I'm torn, though, on where it ranks personally. There's McGarvey... who lingers around it like the dim, cold light before death destructs you ...and he is quite fricking strong. But Deakins' photography (which is vastly superior to his already excellent work on No Country) is some of the best I've ever seen nonetheless. Shame about how neither is gonna win the Oscar.

2. The surprisingly excellent production/costume design. No one told me there were brilliance outside the lauded. Why didn't ya'll tell me?! Jeez! It all had a beautifully worn-down look, expertly crafted and authentic-looking. It threw me off a bit, but ultimately for the greater good. I really wish that there were more love spread to the non-obvious, but, oh well.

3. Nick Cave and Warren Ellis' score. It's really as wow as I've heard, if a little... unoriginal. It's brilliant, don't get me wrong, but at times it sounded like it belonged more in Millions or Munich than where it actually was. It was weird too, with the narration playing, and the interesting inverted camera flashback thingamawhozits, but I was -honestly- expecting some random saint I'm only scarcely familiar with who's smoking or speaking in Aramaic to give Bob advice about what to do with the ₤270,000 that fell out of the sky. I'm weird.

4. Les femmes invisibles. I was saddened by, but understanding to, the lack of female involvement in the film: Mary-Louise Parker as Zee, Jesse's (if they investigated her even a little bit, it would easily show that she was) hurting wife -- Alison Elliot as Martha Bolton, Bob and Charley's sister (who is more often heard than seen) -- Kailin See as Sarah Hite, Wood's stepmother and a romantic conquest of Dick Liddil (because she's a golddigging whore) -- and, most importantly, Zooey Deschanel as Dorothy Evans, Bob's confidante and presumed lover (who sings beautifully and is in the movie a full three minutes!). That one made me sad.

5. Uh... that, uh, Ben's brother, guy... In all seriousness, can I get a "Dayam!" I mean, what the hell man?!? Where'd you get that brilliance!? Holy shit! I'll say it right now: Even though it's actually irrelevant because of the vagrant category fraud, I'm pretty sure he's better than Bardem and Mühe. It might be the best performance of the year, for all I know! Incredible. Fucking incredible. Who cares about my swearing! TELL ME HE DOESN'T FUCKING DESERVE IT!

A. A. A. A. A. A. A beautiful, dreamy masterpiece.

Happy Chinese New Year Post Pictures of Ziyi Zhang Day!

2008-02-07T13:26:00.000-05:00

This is all my quota allows... and it's all you need. (see also, also)

2008-02-07T05:18:00.001-05:00

I think I just non-sexually orgasmed, a bit.

Gather Round, Children, It's High Time Ye Learned

2008-02-02T14:14:00.000-05:00

After a viewing of The Nanny Diaries (which is surprisingly good, btw), I have decided to officially state something here that I've always said, but have only now fully realized.

The Lovely Laura Linney is the Lord incarnate.
Discuss her obvious omnipotent majesty. Hey, at least I'm posting something!

Seven Awkward Randominities

2008-02-01T08:46:00.000-05:00

1. Thanks to the suggestion of a friend (you know who you are), I'm actually starting to like Tori Amos. Or rather, so far, I'm really starting to like how completely awesomely insane she is, most specifically referring to "Raspberry Swirl." I have no idea what is going on that video, or why she's a lesbian, or why Daniel Brühl is there, or why that dress makes her look like a smacked-up Lizzie Bennet, or why I keep thinking of Billy Elliot when I watch it... I have problems.

2. This video is awesome.

3. Since it's 8:30 in the morning, I'm not seeing There Will Be Blood today. And that make me sad. Yeah, I could just see it Sunday (my mom almost threw up when I told her that Paula Abdul was doing the half-time show, with Randy Jackson, and that Ryan Seacrest was hosting, so that's a very good sign), but still. I feel even more pathetic than I usually do for not having seen it already. And add to that I have all the puzzle pieces to the plot, because everyone else on earth has seen it and has blabbed in my e-presence. I just have no idea how the pieces fit together. And they're still freaky ambiguous. And I don't know what's a spoiler and what isn't.

(And if you or anyone else tells me what is up with the whole "milkshake" thing, I'll kick you in the shins! And them too, I guess!)

4. Sienna Miller, is that you? Oh, it isn't? Okay. Whatever.

5. Elizabeth is one of my most favoritist movies, you know that. Last August, I ranted about the fact that, according to information gathered at the time, Universal was only releasing an HD-DVD special edition to coincide with the imperfect sequel (which actually spawned one of my most popular "monkey texts"). I'm very, very glad I was wrong. They did release a DVD (phew). The downside? I already had one. That was bought from Blockbuster. And is almost nine years old, and skips. And yet... I have the special edition sitting next to me now. You wouldn't tell from the picture to the left (because it's not a picture of the box and it looks kinda green), but it's SHINY. So very SHINY. SHINY SHINY SHINY SHINY SHINY SHINY SHINY SHINY SHINY While we're on this note, here's my really randomly placed review for Bug: Ksdfjwedf sedfwd fwoejfwef wedo, dswsd swqa opawkswdn QUEEN MOTHER BUG!!

Totally.

6. I just saw a TV spot for Atonement, with the whole "this movie is GOD so see it" type of advertising all Oscar nominees do. Nothing special. But there were three twists: it was split screened horizontally with the obvious brilliant clips on the top and bottom, Peter Travers had a quote (GASP!), and -- this is big -- it's music was "Apologize." That's right: OneRepublic. For f**king Atonement. And they were even playing to the young people by putting it's "for the new generation," whatever the hell that means. But the thing is... it was brilliant. It might be the fact I'm still in shellshock by it, but it was kinda perfect. But weird. Incredibly weiiiiiird. I also really hope they didn't use it because of the synonymness of the titles. That would be bad.

7. Non, je ne regrette rien my ass. But it's pretty.

ETA I need a hug.

Cate & Marion

2008-01-29T18:25:00.000-05:00

I originally posted this response to the below picture at AD, and it's just so brilliant (I'm so humble, ain't I?), I had to relay it to here...

Marion: I can feel your baby kicking! Ooh! Wait... now I can hear the screams of thousands of lost souls. I can see miles and miles of blood. I... can... feel... DEATH!!!

AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

-----------------------explodes-----------------------

Cate: Hah. Never gets old.

--fin--

I'm Gonna Throw Up Now, Thank You Very Much

2008-01-28T00:53:00.000-05:00

I'm only posting this purely unholy video because I'm a masochist. Or a sadist. Whatever. [shudders]

Breaking News: Suvereto Has Broken Up

2008-01-27T16:40:00.000-05:00

(rltd) Apparently, they broke up because Charlie Manson (the lead guitarist) didn't want to be on the same stage as Oskar Schindler (the bassist), and it went down like WWI from there. [sigh] The tragedies will never stop, will they?

Well, Schindler and his long-time friend Janis Joplin have decided to create a new band, with the help of his former Suvereto bandmates Mrs. Buttersworth and Archimedes, on the keyboard and drums respectively. Hermia (of Shakespeare Can Suck It) has joined on as the xylophonist. They haven't announced who will be their guitarist yet, but all guesses point to either Queen Victoria or Fred Thompson, who is jobless and bored.

Here is their as-of-yet unfinished album, to be released in April:

1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first article title on the page is the name of your band.

2. http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four words of the very last quote is the title of your album.

3. http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/
The third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

You then take the pic and add your band name and the album title to it, then post your pic.

(Flickr pic)

Very Quick SAG Predictions

2008-01-27T13:56:00.000-05:00

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Leading Role:
Daniel Day-Lewis, There Will Be Blood

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Leading Role:
Julie Christie, Away from Her

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Supporting Role:
Javier Bardem, No Country for Old Men

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Supporting Role:
Cate Blanchett, I'm Not There

Outstanding Performance by a Cast in a Motion Picture:
No Country for Old Men

Outstanding Performance by a Stunt Ensemble in a Motion Picture:
The Bourne Ultimatum

It's like I posted nothing at all! [scratch] Nothing at all! [scratch] Nothing at all! [scratch]

Ho. Ly. Shit.

2008-01-22T17:10:00.000-05:00

I've said that seventy-eight times already, and it's still as strong.

Damn. Just... damn.

2008-01-22T09:43:00.000-05:00

I feel conflicted.

Today was supposed to be the Apocalypse, but... nothing. No economic depression, no fire and brimstone. But we did get that Blanchett double nom we all feared.

"I am very, very sorry for the terrible distress that I have caused you."
And Jolie and Adams were snubbed.

And there's no mention of "Le Festin".

And Joe Wright is nowhere.

But Surf's Up was nominated.

As was Norbit.

APOCALYPSE!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!??!?!?!??!??!
The conflict is my heart is that there is way more good than bad, foremost being...

ATONEMENT GOT IN!!!!!!

And Sarah Polley for Adapted Screenplay!

And SAOIRSE!

And Laura Linney! PAZUZU!!!

AND ATONEMENT GOT IN!!!!!!

And Marit Allen got a posthumous nomination for Costume Design!

And Across the Universe was actually nominated for something!

AND ATONEMENT GOT IN!!!!!!

Seamus McGarvey in Cinematography!

And an Enchanted triple nom!

AND ATONEMENT GOT IN!!!!!!

And Ratatouille in Score, Sound and Sound Editing!

And a double nom for Deakins!

AND ATONEMENT GOT IN!!!!!!

And Juno is actually present! Even Director. [weird look]

But CODY! PAGE! BEST PICTURE!

AND, finally...

ATONEMENT GOT IN!!!!!!

Ya'll knew I'd be like this if it were nominated.

WHICH IT IS!!!!!!

(This message brought you by three and half hours of sleep)

ATONEMENT GOT IN!!!!!!

The Way They Are, Or I Are, Or Someone Are

2008-01-21T00:07:00.000-05:00

I actually finished these over a day ago, but oh well.

Well, here they are. My COMPLETE AND FINAL OSCAR NOMINATION PREDICTIONS.

(*EDITED TO REMOVE GREENWOOD FROM SCORE*)

BEST PICTURE:
Atonement
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Juno
No Country for Old Men
There Will Be Blood
----------
Alternate: Into the Wild
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Ratatouille

BEST DIRECTOR:
Paul Thomas Anderson, There Will Be Blood
Joel & Ethan Coen, No Country for Old Men
Sean Penn, Into the Wild
Julian Schnabel, The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Joe Wright, Atonement
----------
Alternate: Tim Burton, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Julie Taymor, Across the Universe

BEST ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE:
George Clooney, Michael Clayton
Daniel Day-Lewis, There Will Be Blood
Johnny Depp, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
Emile Hirsch, Into the Wild
Viggo Mortensen, Eastern Promises
----------
Alternate: Ryan Gosling, Lars and the Real Girl
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: James McAvoy, Atonement

BEST ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE:
Amy Adams, Enchanted
Julie Christie, Away from Her
Marion Cotillard, La Vie en Rose
Angelina Jolie, A Mighty Heart
Ellen Page, Juno
----------
Alternate: Cate Blanchett, Elizabeth: The Golden Age
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Laura Linney, The Savages

BEST ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE:
Casey Affleck, The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
Javier Bardem, No Country for Old Men
Philip Seymour Hoffman, Charlie Wilson's War
Hal Holbrook, Into the Wild
Tom Wilkinson, Michael Clayton
----------
Alternate: Tommy Lee Jones, No Country for Old Men
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Albert Finney, Before the Devil Knows You're Dead

BEST ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE:
Cate Blanchett, I'm Not There
Ruby Dee, American Gangster
Saoirse Ronan, Atonement
Amy Ryan, Gone Baby Gone
Tilda Swinton, Michael Clayton
----------
Alternate: Catherine Keener, Into the Wild
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Romola Garai, Atonement

BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY:
Juno (Diablo Cody)
Lars and the Real Girl (Nancy Oliver)
Michael Clayton (Tony Gilroy)
Ratatouille (Brad Bird, Jan Pinkava, and Jim Capobianco)
The Savages (Tamara Jenkins)
----------
Alternate: Before the Devil Knows You're Dead (Kelly Masterson)
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium (Zach Helm)

BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY:
Atonement (Christopher Hampton)
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly (Ronald Harwood)
Into the Wild (Sean Penn)
No Country for Old Men (Joel & Ethan Coen)
There Will Be Blood (Paul Thomas Anderson)
----------
Alternate: James Vanderbilt, Zodiac
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Away from Her (Sarah Polley)

SHOT IN THE F**KING DARK:

BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM:
The Counterfeiters (Austria)
Days of Darkness (Canada)
12 (Russia)
The Unknown Woman (Italy)
The Year My Parents Went on Vacation (Brazil)

IF THIS IS ANY DIFFERENT, HUMANITY PAYS:

BEST ANIMATED FILM:
Persepolis
Ratatouille
The Simpsons Movie

REST OF THE CATEGORIES:

BEST ART DIRECTION:
Atonement (Sarah Greenwood)
Elizabeth: The Golden Age (Guy Dyas)
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (Stuart Craig)
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (Dante Ferretti)
There Will Be Blood (Jack Fisk)
----------
Alternate: Hairspray (David Gropman)
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Sunshine (Mark Tildesley)

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY:
The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (Roger Deakins)
Atonement (Seamus McGarvey)
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly (Janusz Kaminski)
No Country for Old Men (Roger Deakins)
There Will Be Blood (Roger Elswit)
----------
Alternate: Into the Wild (Eric Gautier)
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Elizabeth: The Golden Age (Remi Adefarasin)

BEST COSTUME DESIGN:
The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (Patricia Norris)
Atonement (Jacqueline Durran)
Elizabeth: The Golden Age (Alexandra Byrne)
Hairspray (Rita Ryack)
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (Colleen Atwood)
----------
Alternate: The Golden Compass (Ruth Meyers)
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Amazing Grace (Jenny Beaven)

BEST FILM EDITING:
Atonement (Paul Tothill)
Michael Clayton (John Gilroy)
No Country for Old Men ("Roderick Jaynes")
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (Chris Lebenzon)
There Will Be Blood (Dylan Tichenor)
----------
Alternate: Into the Wild (Jay Cassidy)
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: The Bourne Ultimatum (Christopher Rouse)

BEST MAKE-UP:
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
La Vie en Rose
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
----------
Alternate: 300
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Elizabeth: The Golden Age

BEST ORIGINAL SCORE:
Atonement (Dario Marianelli)
Eastern Promises (Howard Shore)
The Kite Runner (Alberto Iglesias)
Lust, Caution (Alexandre Desplat)
Ratatouille (Michael Giacchino)
----------
Alternate: 3:10 to Yuma (Marco Beltrami)
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Sunshine (John Murphy & Underworld)

BEST ORIGINAL SONG:
"Come So Far (Got So Far To Go)" - Hairspray
"Falling Slowly" - Once
"Guaranteed" - Into the Wild
"La Despedida" - Love in the Time of Cholera
"That's How You Know" - Enchanted
----------
Alternate: "Grace Is Gone" - Grace is Gone
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: "If You Want Me" - Once

BEST VISUAL EFFECTS:
The Golden Compass
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
Transformers
----------
Alternate: 300
If I Were AMPAS, I'd Add: Sunshine

I refuse to do Documentary Feature, Sound Mixing, Sound Editing, Animated Short, Live Action Short, or Documentary Short because I have no clue. Not a one.

The only other comment I can add is this:

ATONEMENT BETTER FRICKING HAPPEN!
[cries]

Oh, Just Screw It

2008-01-19T00:11:00.000-05:00

This is my new-ish avatar on the cover of Vogue (PJ is good with showing people these kind of things, I'll admit it). I'm surprised no one has said anything about it. Ya know, how, randomly, it changes from one Briony to another? I'd say it would be highly suspect. And I know why it would be highly suspect. And I'm going to tell you now. Even though I probably shouldn't. And it might not be true, but I feel it is, at least now. My avatar changed because, because...

[REDACTED]
I know! I don't know what the hell happened either! It's not an insult, but DAYAM, woman! Take a breather! Yeesh!

Want to know what this was about? Convince me. Seriously.

But If I WERE To Tell You Something About It...

2008-01-18T00:35:00.000-05:00

... I'd tell you that Saoirse rocked, and Briony is my new hero. Word.

It's like I just told you nothing at all!

Explosions Originales

2008-01-17T16:48:00.000-05:00

There is a lot going on with the Chloes, but I can't actually do anything until June 11th. Because -- seriously -- that is when the nominees for the 1st Annual JMC Chloe Awards will be announced. Why 1st? Wasn't that last year? Well, no. I decided to throw out last year's completely. But this year I can start fresh with lessons learned from my many mistakes.

And why June 11th? Because it will be exactly 16 months (the eligibility period) from my first '07 screening, which was Hannibal Rising. I believe it was a 4:30/5:00 showing, so they should be posted by 7:00. In 5 months. Okaaaay... Here are three bullet points concerning JMC07:

1. Best Actress.
Good lord, somebody shoot me. Not you. I mean, we've got Page, Cotillard, Christie, Adams, Jolie, Miller, Portman, Linney, Linney, Knightley (le duh), Blanchett, Blonsky, Ricci, Shannon, Watts, Gainsbourg, and (probably the frontrunner, but don't quote me on that) van Houten. [EXPLODES]

2. Best Original Song.
In a same situation with different results, the Original Song category is so crowded, but it's glorious instead of mind-exploding. Let's see, theres "That's How You Know", "Ever Ever After", "Happy Working Song", "Le Festin", "Falling Slowly", "If You Want Me", "Lyra", "Come So Far", "Back Where You Belong", and "Keep Your Mind Wide Open" (once the frontrunner). I only have a very vague idea about who is the f/r now, and it might be four of them. But god, they're all so good.

3. Atonement.
That review I've been yelling about for almost a week now isn't as progressed as it should be, so I've decided to take it down from the release schedule. It needs a complete re-write, more studio consideration, and a few more test screenings before anything is finalized. I'm sorry. I really want to talk about it too (and give it it's damned grade), just to say what I wanna say, and what is SO obviously true... and things even I didn't see coming...

So, what's up with your own personal opinions on these categories?

And also, I ask hesitantly, what are your opinions about Atonement?

Happy Birthday, Zooey Deschanel!

2008-01-17T14:49:00.000-05:00

The Sunshine-ing

2008-01-15T02:47:00.000-05:00

Sunshine scares me. In a completely awesome, creeptastic, apocalyptic by-way-of apocryphal way. And it's a post-visual cat monkey. That statement makes no sense. And yet it does. Like Sunshine. See what I did there?

The movie is bonkers, like virtually everyone says. But dammit, I loved it. And not in a “so bad it's good” way; I loved it in a “so brilliant even though I have no fricking idea what the hell happened in the third act. Or why the hell there was a dead guy with no skin killing people in the name of God. Or where the hell Rose Byrne went or how the hell she ended up where she was. Or what the hell was up with the box that appeared out of nowhere. Or why they just had to kill Michelle Yeoh. Or WHY THE FUCK DID THEY REPEAT AN ABRIDGED VERSION OF THE MOVIE IN THE FUCKING CREDITS?!?!?!?!??!?!?!” sort of way. Yeah... So. Uh. Damn. It was weird. That is all.

"Can We Have Our Money Atonement Now?"

2008-01-14T16:02:00.000-05:00

That stupid, frickin' Atonement review should be finished within the next day. Hopefully. So, to hold you monkeys over until then (and hopefully make you a hell of a lot more ravenous about it), here are the 22 greatest seconds in the history of television.

Thank you, HFPA members, for making a very smart choice last night.

LOOK! It's an Actual Word!

2008-01-13T22:03:00.000-05:00

SQUEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And Atonement won the Globe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If only I said it would...

There Will Be Blood. There's Gotta Be.

2008-01-13T20:01:00.000-05:00

CALL FOR BLOOD. CALL FOR BLOOD. CALL FOR BLOOD.
... and I'm not even a Cowboys fan. I just want to see people to want to burn Señora Airhead at the stake. Wouldn't that be awesome, at least in a cosmic sort of way?